I wrote a blog post last month or maybe in January that questioned if it actually gets better. I answered the question with a yes and an explanation. You can read the blog post here.
Now Chris of Facebook page and blog called From the Bungalow has issued a writing challenge based on music.
I like to think that I am a halfway decent writer and I suppose, in the end, that's all that matters - that I was happy with what I did. At any rate, as I mentioned earlier, I wrote this blog in January and I found a song that works. I'm going to attempt to update it with lyrics and see where it goes but it's possible a new blog will come out of it. I think this is an important cause so I have included the links to Amazon and iTunes.
The song is "It Does Get Better" by The L Project.
Music & Words by Georgey Payne.
You can find their Facebook Page by clicking here: The L Project
You can purchase the song at most download sites: Amazon and iTunes
Could you walk through a town, see a boy beaten down 'gainst a wall,
And think nothing at all? But you think nothing at all.
This is a great question. Could you really do that? Would you think better him than me or even worse that whatever it is he probably deserves that treatment? I suppose in this day and age it is easier to pretend you saw nothing at all. You never know how sick those doing the beating really are....will they come after you next? Or would they be like most bullies and back down immediately solely because they've never had anyone speak up to them before. It's almost the same thing they ask on the show, "What Would you do?"
For the ones who can't see or not hear any sounds in this life,
Try to feel what that's like? 'Cause no one gets to decide.
This song deals with the rash of gay suicides that happen because there are so many who aren't strong enough to stand up to their tormentors. The lyrics are attempting to get someone to understand that there are things that you can't control in this life and no one gets to decide what happens to you. It wants you to place yourself in a world where you can't see or perhaps can't hear. Try to feel what that's like. On the flip side of the coin, imagine that you're gay and despite what people say, you know you didn't choose this life. No one gets to decide these things.
When days don't seem right just shine,
'Cause this life is yours and mine.
On a day like today when you're walking away,
Hold your head up so high, 'cause I tell you from here...
That you've come so far, and always be who you are.
When your head hits the floor, and you're bleeding some more,
Let me tell you I swear...
That it does get better... from where you are.
There are always going to be days where you just simply don't feel your best. Maybe you are coming down with something or perhaps you just broke up with the one you thought was The One. Maybe your parents didn't take your coming out all that well or perhaps you were taunted and beaten up. Just by being yourself, you have already come far. You could even say for simply for being hated for what you are rather than loved for what you aren't. It does get better from here. You might stand up for yourself or you might just grow older or maybe both. For me, it was simply growing older and letting go. Religion tormented me for years and I finally let it go. I've prayed to God after sex to forgive me for what I have just done. I even worried that one day God will turn his back on me because I ask for forgiveness for the same thing over and over again. I even asked to not be gay anymore and probably 20 years since that first prayer, I'm still gay. I've come to the realization that being gay is what I am meant to be and I make no apologies for it. My demons were my own and I had to stand up to them just like I would have an actual human.
For all those men in their skirts, all the boys loving boys
And the girls loving girls, I tell you it does get better.
Simply put transgender, drag queens, drag kings, gay men and lesbians. It will all get better in time. There will be no overnight results but trust that it will get better.
For all the lovers who have smiled
As they walked down the aisle in this life,
Saying beautiful words, they were finally heard.
And all the women and the men who've marched time and again
For this fight, they were finally right,
Now we're all breathing life...
There are now eight states that allow gay marriage. It does make you wonder why must their be the distinction and I really can't answer that question. After all, when Massachusetts allowed gay couples to wed there were a slew of states that specifically banned gay marriages against their own Constitutions (which promise that every one in the state has the same equal rights). If gay couples couldn't have gotten married previous to this time then why the rush to ban it outright? The lyrics go on to talk about how these couples are now saying their vows with the recognition from, at least, the state they live in. Their voices were finally heard by others and it's an accumulation of all those men and women who came before them. Those who marched for our rights time and time again. Whether it be for black people, women, interracial couples or gay couples. All those countless men and women who marched over and over again to show where they stand. Some were maimed or even killed for standing up but if not for them, it's very well possible that these couples now wouldn't be saying their vows. And now that they don't have to hide their love, they can finally breathe in life and all that it can offer.
And now that we've come so far, and always stay who you are.
When we're walking so gay, hold your head high and say,
For the ones who can't see from the challenges feared,
"You're not on your own, together were stronger,
Never get thrown". When you're feeling so small,
get your back off that wall, will you open your eyes?
Now that you've made it this far, don't back down and always stay true to yourself despite what everyone else may think you need to be. No one said it would be easy, they just said it would get better. Once you are holding your head up high and you are staying true to yourself be a beacon for those who can't see that far ahead because they fear the challenges that may or may not come. Their so blinded by fear that they see nothing good coming out of being themselves. But you can be that light to remind them that they are not alone, someone has trod down this path before and can be a huge help. Just when you think that you a small and are backed up against a wall, open your eyes to the possibility of those things around you. A friend once said that she was told that if you close one door another door will open but she's closed several doors and the new one never opens. I told her that as she closes doors, new ones will "open" but she has to take the initiative and courage to turn the knob and walk through.
'Cause I tell you it does get better... from where you are.
And if that sky up above sees the children you've loved,
And all the families you've grown, from first being told "no,"
It get's better from where we are.
For all those men in their skirts, all the girls who eat dirt,
All the boys loving boys and the girls loving girls,
It gets better...
And now that we've come so far, and always stay who you are,
For all those men in their skirts, all the boys loving boys
And the girls loving girls... I tell you it does get better...
I chose this song because it makes my face leak every time that I hear it. I'll be honest and say that my life has never been as bad as some have it today. I did, at one time, fear owning a gun because I was worried that I couldn't trust myself with it. I never actually contemplated suicide but at the same time, I didn't want to have the tools at my disposal in case things ever got that bad. I still don't own a gun and probably never will; although, I like to think I could use one if someone ever threatened me or my family.
The only thing I can tell you is that it does get better. I wish I could tell you it's better now but with the proliferation of parents who don't actually want to parent (and expect someone else to do it for them), it probably won't get better until you're older. Also understand that some people are just mean for sport and others are mean simply because no one has ever stood up to them or because they don't know any other way to be. Some people wrap their evil up in the American flag and carry a cross. They'll work that tired Christian drag for all its worth.
Just know that "It Does Get Better".